Sunday, November 6, 2011

My health

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1- regarding bronchial asthma..
lately i found it is difficult for me to do my job as a doctor competently as my heath status not so good..
i dunno whether the urti or the pregnancy itself worsen my asthma..
wheezing most of the time..
i dunno what is the precipitating factor..
i dunno if i develop some new allergy..
really sad..
i dun ever2 dare to eat prawn anymore..
previously i still eat but i take piriton after that..
but recently,it didn't work..
instead of taking piriton,i'm still having bronchospasm..
it's really terrible..
better dun try anymore or u might had anaphylactic shock..


2-my pregnancy..
it's reaching 12 weeks..
since i know that i pregnant,
i never had a good day with good health condition..
it's totally makes my life different..
plus i had chronic urticaria..
really itchy..
everyday just rub with calamine to make myself comfortable..
i really felt that pregnancy is very adventure..
however, i need to endure it..
be patient..pray a lot that this pregnancy will be uneventful..
only Allah knows how difficult time i face..
thank you Allah..


3-recurrent urti
although i'm not in medical ward,
still having recurrent urti..
very bad..
i'm scared to take multiple medication since i' pregnant..
on top of that,
not enough rest make me late to recover..


whatever it is,i'm glad i'm having supportive husband n family..
without them,i might not be strong enough to go through all this...

Sunday, September 11, 2011

learn nothing~

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i dunno why i feel like this..
after almost 3 months in medical,
still too much thing to learn..
everyday passed by very fast..
i just feel that too much ward work..
and i'm only tired doing ward work
back from work,i'll try not to study..
i need space for myself..
i need time to enjoy my life..
to prevent further depression..
but it end up like i learn nothing
what should i do..
should i divide my time more efficiently..
but if i at home with my husband...
we will end up watching movie together..haha
but it is really enjoyable..
at least at that moment,
i can forget all my problem at workplace..
but still i need to study for assessment..
but still i lazy..
i tend to do other thing such
cooking,reading magazine,watching movie,fb
i dun want to miss every single moment to enjoy my life..
life should be colourful, right?hehe

Wednesday, September 7, 2011

learn to separate my mind~

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urm..since i work as a doctor,
everyday i have sort of generalized anxiety disorder..
every moment keep thinking about my patient
every moment thinking will my patient survive?
keep worrying for the day after tomorrow..
till i almost develop depression and cannot sleep at night..
my husband always advice me not to think about work if u are at home..

the moment i was given title DR,
i already feel a big responsibility put on me..
there is one episode that i should do peritoneal dialysis for my patient
but i need to postpone becoz he had coagulopathy..
so i pass over my job to oncall people
to transfuse fresh frozen plasma before PD..
at that time,it's already 6 pm..
becoz i'm really worry about my patient,
so i ask my husband to accompany me to see this patient at night
i went to ward @ 9pm
fortunately,the management was carried out as planned..
this really show that i'm too worry about my patient..

so,as time passing by..
i learned that i should let go..
don't think too much..
just do your job efficiently..
then let's God decide whether they will alive or dead..
you should rest properly at home..
doing your interest..fulfill time with something enjoyable..
life must be colourful :)

Sunday, September 4, 2011

need vs desire

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sempena xbenda nak buat..
aku nak update blog yang da berhabuk ni..
sebenarnye aku update2 ni sebagai kenangan untuk masa depan..

kali ni nak cakap pasal duit..hehe
nak kata jadi doctor ni kaya xjugak..
tapi hidup tu serba cukup la..
kat msia mmg nmpk mcm gaji doctor ni banyak..
tp kalo nk dibandingkan dgn oversea,
gaji doctor msia ni seciput je..
sebab tu kena fikir keje kerana ALLAH..
baru la rasa insyaALLAH semuanya cukup..

nak citer ni..
mula2 keje mana dpt gaji..
dapat gaji pun masa lepas bulan kedua keje..
bayangkan la mmg xde duit..
nasib baik famili dan adik beradik sgt membantu..
duduk umah pun kosong..
xde perabot satu pun..
sewa rumah pun mahal..
makan pun kena budget..
baju pun basuh tangan..
tido pun atas comforter..
bunyi nye mcm sedey je..
tp bersyukur dengan apa yang ada..
asalkan boleh tido dan esoknye boleh g keje,
tu da cukup..

sampai la satu weekend tu,
my parents in law datang melawat..
diorg rasa sgt kesian tgk keadaan kitorg..
kitorg rasa ok je..
then my parents in law bertegas nak blikan barang2 basic,
nnt da ada duit bayarlah balik..
masa tu aku postcall..
diorg ajak g kedai electric..
lastnye..
beli 1) mesin basuh 10kg
2) peti sejuk 440 L
then g kedai perabot plak..
3) beli set meja makan 4 org
4)beli tilam queen..

tu pun da abes banyak..haha
then bile da dapat gaji..
mula2 xnk beli,
tp bile fikir raya nanti org dtg umah,
tgk2 ruang tamu kosong,duk atas tikar je..
carpet mmg xde la,sbb aku n hubby allergic

so pg la ke courts mammoth menghabiskan duit..hehe
mmg trus bli on the spot..
5) beli set bilik tidur
6)beli set sofa
7)beli coffee table..

nampak mcm da byk plak benda kitorg beli..
the next weekend,
jalan2 kat carrefour..
8)beli blender
9)beli set mineral water yg ada hot,warm n normal water..
10)then beli sebuah TV LCD 42 inci
haha..tv tu adalah yg xdirancang..
merbahaya btol belanja mcm ni..
bila da beli tv..
kena la bli tv cabinet..

then pergi ke court mammoth lg
11) tv cabinet

hurm..nampak mcm begitu boros kami berdua ni..
tp tu bnde penting..
kena beli jgk..
aku ada byk desire lg..

1)kereta xbeli lg..
tgh fikir nak beli kereta apa..
nak bli kereta besar cket..
senang bile da ada anak..
nk beli grand livina ke
vios ke
atau honda city?

2)teringin nak beli phone baru..
nak bli iphone ke
samsung tab ke
ipad ke
banyak sgt pilihan..

3)nk bli kamera canggih..
DSLR ke..
tp aku xrajin amik gmbr pn..
haha..

jd kena pk btol2 before bli..jgn membazir..

xlupa jugak..
da daftar haji ngn hubby..
hidup ni kalo xingat akhirat,
xkemana nye kite..

pengalaman bekerja as doctor~

0 comments
almost 3 bulan da kerja di department medical
mencabar giler..
sehinggakan samapai satu tahap aku menangis..
xmampu menahan stress..
tapi kerja perlu diteruskan..
never give up..
Allah is always by ur side..
itulah yang buat aku jadi kuat..
pengalaman kenam arah tu xpayah cakap la..
kadang2 aku sendiri pun xfaham..
ada la sorang MO ni yang memang akan maki hamun n jerit2 kat aku..
sgt2 xpaham nape..
dia bagaikan ada dua version..in 5 minute boleh jerit2 kt aku,
then in 5 minute boleh ckp baik2..
sehinggakan semua HO lain pun agak pelik melihat betapa emo nye MO tu pada aku..
aku pun xtau apa salah aku..
sepanjang aku duduk wad dgn dia,
aku memng stress memanjang..
siang malam terfikir pasal keje..
sampai xleh tido..
berusaha pegi keje 6.15 so that aku blh bt keje dgn perfect..
n dia xmarah aku..
yg pelik nye,
orang len punye la byk xabes review dia xmarah pun,
siap tolong review lg..
aku ni aritu tinggal satu je xreview lg,
dia jerit kt aku sampai satu wad tengok aku..
sgt xpaham..da la kubikel aku paling penuh,
orang len xsampi 10 pun xsiap review lg..
aku punye berbelas2 orang patient..
punye la aku tahan airmata time tu..
xkan nk nanges depan patient..
abes je round,
aku g ngadu ngn sorang HO ni..
memang menanges la aku..
disebabkan minggu yg terlalu stress..
ada satu hari tu aku postcall..
i'm really compliance to my MDI..
tp xtau nape..time tu bronchospasm gile2..
mmg xrelieve langsung..
sampai 2 orang MO aku dtg attend tgk aku..(ni bukan MO yg marah2 tu,masa tu dia cuti)
siap bg iv hydrocortisone 200mg stat..
still not resolving...
my MO want to admit me to the ward..
mesti la aku xnak..
then aku blk umah..
even belum kul 5..
MO aku yang suh balik..
sepanjang malam kt umah mmg teruk xleh nafas..
esok pagi rasa xmampu nk pegi keje..
so aku terpaksa decide untuk EL..
kt umah sorang2 pn breahtless jgk..
masa tu aku xaware pun jadual oncall da berubah..
rupenye aku oncall masa tu..
sbnrnye aku da inform sorang HO yg incharge kitorng ni..
tp dia xsempat mencari org untuk ganti aku,
disebabkan mak dia admit HDW..
lepastu,sorang lg HO yg incharge ni,
call aku dan marah2 mengapa aku xcari ganti..
the point is i dunno that i'm oncall..
no one tell me that they change jadual oncall
nak tak nak..dengan terpaksa nye ak g dengue call masa tu..
datang2 je aku tengok MO da review sume patient..
dan kebetulan tu adalah MO yang nak admit aku semalam
masa tu rasa bersyukur sgt
pasti Allah mendengar rintihan hati yg da xmampu lg nk keje..
masa malam tu,that MO came tu dengue ward..
dia sgt terkejot tgk aku wujud kt wad..
sebab dia tau aku EL..
MO tu punye la marah sape yg suh aku oncall jgk walaupun aku EL..
then straight away MO tu tulis MC untuk aku..
tp xguna pn MC..
becoz no one want to replace me..
sedey btol rasa masa tu..
esoknye aku still dtg ward..
sbb aku rasa member aku sorang tu mcm xwilling nk tolong cover cubicle aku..
then masa round,specialist aku bising la..
nape aku still dtg ward,
nape xde orang ganti aku..
mcm dramatic gile..
specialist pn suh aku blk rehat..
aku keje jgk sampai ptg..
tp esoknye aku EL lg(tp tu ari sabtu)..pagi tu pun g amik neb kt A&E..
ari ahad nak EL tp kawan aku xde sape boleh ganti..
aku g je la keje..
aku xkan lupa peristiwa ni..
aku pun xtau mcm mana aku boleh lalui semua ni..
jawapan nye kerana..
ALLAH is always by your side..

Tuesday, May 17, 2011

EPILOG CINTA FADHLI & HANISAH EP 7

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12.30

Ketibaan rombongan pengantin lelaki..

Aku da agak da..

Aku xkan berjaya halang benda yang kitorg xnk ni dari terjadi..

“TEPUNG TAWAR”

Satu adat hindu yg konon2 kena buat..

Ada la orang tu cakap kot2 nanti jadi pape kalo xbuat..

Kan da jadi mcm syirik..

Lain da jadi nye..

Diorg lupa segala yang terjadi atas kuasa Allah..

Walaupun dalam hati ini memberontak..

Tapi demi aku hormat pada mereka,

Terpaksa aku turutkan..sebab mak xde dalam tu..

I’m alone..xde orang boleh back up apa aku nk ckp..

Semoga Allah ampunkan dosa kami sekeluarga dan

Semoga majlis itu dalam redha Allah..

Dalam sibuk fadhli da datang,diorg sempat jugak buat beras kunyit..

Menyakitkan hati aku bila tengok diorg buat..

Sabar je la masa tu..

Bukan aku xsabar nak jumpa fadhli..

Cuma cuba bayangkan..

Rombongan diorg tunggu tengah panas..

Dan aku rasa sangat xsopan buat diorg mcm tu..

Lepas tu..banyak plak mulut..

“ada yg suh tunggu depan rumah je”

“ada yg suh jalan separuh”

Manusia ni pelik2..

Masing2 nk orang ikut cara dia..betapa sabarnya aku masa tu..

Rasa nk menyumpah2 orang yg lagak pandai ni..

Plan mak sebenarnye nk makan beradab terus..

Tapi ada orang tu suh buat tepung tawar kt pelamin dulu..

Rasa nk menyumpah..

Aku rasa malu dengan family fadhli..

Urm..mmg bad mood gile masa tu..

Sabar sabar dan sabar..

Makan beradab..


As usual,diorg lupa bagi sudu..

Urm..pehal la cuai sgt..

Da la xde orang kt situ untuk aku mintak..

Da la aku xsuke sbb menu makan beradab tu da berubah..

Tak seperti yang aku plan dgn mak..

Sotong celup tepung aku bertukar jadi sotong goreng kunyit..

Ikan bawal tu masak 3 rasa..tapi aku rasa xsedap pun..

Ayam plak buat ala2 ayam percik,tp besar giler..

Macam mana la aku nak mkn..

Mmg mulut aku bising je xleh nk makan..

Dengan asyik nak amik gmbr je..

Penat2..gila penat..

Lastnyer makan nasi minyak je,minum air n makan dadih..

Selera nak makan pun da xde..

Tapi perut ni lapa gile2..

Sabar je la..

Then amik gambar dengan kawan2..

Sungguh xsangka..DR MUHAMMAD MAAYA sanggup drive sorang dr KL dtg..

With DR MUHAMMAD MAAYA..anaesthetist

Thanks a lot..

Ramai sgt kawan2 dtg..

SKSM :syud,syida,adi kurnia

SMK SG BESAR: tina,aman,ien,

SAINS SELANGOR: che’ra,ain,ayu,zaireen,zack,wani,bella,adila,dalila,Irma,fitri


Sungguh xsangka ustazah mazinaton sc slangor dtg..

UKM MEDIC: tersangatla ramai..aku xdpt la nak listkan..


With huda,epa,osya,hani..

With osya n huda..

Thanks a lot caryn and jia hui datang :)

Ni junior2 medic..

With half of my study group..kak syud,asilah,kanitha,amal..

With girls medic..

Cikgu2 sekolah rendah dan sekolah menengah

Lecturer PROF SHAHRIR DAN KELUARGA..

3.00ptg

Selepas pakai baju biru,

Tukar baju songket merah..

Ni double panas..peluh banyak gile

Makeup pun cair

Konon2 nak g amik gambar outdoor la..

Tapi………

Tinggal harapan je la..

Memandangkan kawan2 datang xputus2..

Aku rasa xpatot kalo aku keluar dan xlayan tetamu datang..

Kawan2 lagi penting..

Da la diorg datang jauh2..i should appreciate..

Layan la kawan2 dan junior yg datang..

Penat…haus sangat..xsempat minum air..

Sesi bergambar mmg xputus2..

5.00ptg..

Kawan2 da beransur balik..

So aku decide nak tukar baju dan duk dalam bilik aircond..haha

Xsempat pun lap make up sampai abis..

Ada kawan datang lagi..

Tukar baju biasa je la..

Da buka baju songket tadi..


Mcm2..diorg involved in accident,tu lambt datang..

Disebabkan ni kawan sc sel,pas amik gmbr,

Fadhli msuk bilik…

Aku plak lepak ngn diorg kat luar..

Rindu gile ngn diorg..

Ntah mcm mana..

Bila duk ngn diorg..

Tibe2 ada selera nak makan..

Penuh sepinggan nasi aku makan..hehe

Pengantin lapar,td masa makan beradab xlalu makan..

Dlm kul 6.00 ptg,diorg pun blk…

PENATTTTTTTTTTTTTT..

Tapi alhamdulillah..selesai sudah..

Thanks a lot adik beradik aku yg tolong layan kwn2 yg dtg lmbt..

Sekali masuk umah,tgk dapur bersepah gila..

Aku pun xtau nk tolong kemas mcm mana..

Tolong kemas sket2 je..pastu g tido..